


Research

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alien Biology, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-21
Updated: 2013-04-21
Packaged: 2017-12-09 02:26:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/768901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate title "Rose Lalonde's Matchmaking Meteor"</p><p>When a hero of light comes back to life, another one asks for help in creating new life.</p><p>This work uses a Hermaphrodital(?) basis for troll genitalia, so if you have an aversion to that, stay away.</p><p>Each chapter of this thing has a different paring center stage!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Research

**Author's Note:**

> The following is a work of fan-fiction, ertoica and comedy.
> 
> Chapter 1 sets up what little plot there is and contains Aradia >{> Vriska  
> Chapter 2 Contains Sollux<3 Aradia  
> Chapter 3 has John <3 Vriska  
> Chapters beyond that are not done!

Vriska had only been alive again for a day but she was already used to the sensations one misses as a ghost. The touch of actual objects not holograms was refreshing at first but now... Not that she wasn't happy to be alive; Egbert really came through in the end. She knew he would. But after being stuck on the meteor for a day she was starting to miss the freedom the dream bubble afforded, waiting in the meteor for Skaia to make that new universe was just as boring as hiding from jack had been all that time ago. What had it been? A sweep of normal time? Vriska grumbled as she rolled over in bed, she'd taken to sleeping in human beds after her time spent with John in the dream bubbles. Eventually she decided to just take a walk around.

After a while she stumbled upon a room which was quite well lit, inside Rose was sitting reading by a laboratory of sorts. She'd been working with Jane and Kanaya to try and find a way to bring back those trolls which had passed into the dream bubbles without using the ring of life, which required the target to be constantly wearing it. Vriska ran her thumb over the perfectly smooth ring as she pondered their research.

"Do come in." Rose said, not turning away from her book.

"You look 8usy." Vriska remarked upon entering, "Studying this far into the night, that's kind of impressive, in the dorkiest possi8le way."

"This isn't research," Rose said "It's just a bit of reading before bed."

Vriska stared at her, then at the 20 something tomes which surrounded her.

"Right."

"Actually," Rose said, finally turning to face her "I was doing some side research you might be able to help me with."

"I'm not so sure a8out that."

"Come on, you won't even have to do any reading. Actually I think you'll find it fun!" She gestured for Vriska to follow her then walked off.

Vriska eventually followed and caught up with her fellow light player. "What are we going to 8e doing then?"

"That’s for me to know and you to find out; I'm the seer after all." With this rose came to an abrupt stop and gestured to a door.

"You know, you haven't even told me what this research is on." Vriska said, opening the door.

Rose followed behind her and locked the door before answering.

"Interspecies mating." She replied, winking and flicking a switch which illuminated the large room in which they stood.

Vriska surveyed the room, it was a painted a uniform grey colour much like the rest of this damn meteor. A large bed lay in the centre with a few chairs about a yard away from it, suddenly Vriska felt rather uneasy.

"I've done a lot of research on the topic with Kanaya, but that is really only one very small part of the topic. I've requested some more help and they should all be arriving soon."

"W8, one sec8nd!" Vriska exclaimed her cheeks flushed the dull blue of her blood, "Why d8 you think I’ll even agree to this?"

Rose pinned Vriska to the wall with her hands. She moved her mouth closer to her hers before whispering in her ear, “You can get something you’ve wanted for a long time out of it.”

There was a knock at the door. Rose unlocked the door and four of the meteor’s other residents walked in. “The rest of Roses helpers no doubt.” Vriska thought, too bashful to look at them. When she did she was surprised at who she found.

Kanaya, Aradia, Sollux and John all stood before her, turned to face Rose who seemed to be explaining something, Vriska had tuned out to what she was saying; it was all too embarrassing.

Rose walked closer. "Vriska, are you ready to begin?"

"Wh8t do you want from me?" The cerulean blood asked.

"Oh that's simple!" Aradia answered practically skipping up to Vriska. She plunged her mouth onto the blue-blood's and bit down, Vriska had wondered at one point if Aradia harboured any black feelings for her, this seemed to be a definite yes. The lowblood kept her hands free during the kiss and after pulling away used her psychic powers to rip Vriska’s top layer of clothes from her.

"Jegu2, slow down aa" Sollux called watching from the back.

"Black romance is fascinating." Rose exclaimed scribbling down notes on a notepad.

Kanaya tapped her on the shoulder, "Should We Deicide The Initial Pairings Now?" she asked.

"Alright, seeing as Aradia's already chosen Vriska to get with first I suppose we'd best go with Sollux and John first too."

"Rose, uhm, I’m not a homosexual."

Rose sighed. "John, the only homosexual on this ship is Dirk. It's important for my studies that the person engaging in this activity is also the one to have sex with me. I don't particularly want to have sex with my gay ectobiological father, can you understand that?"

"I guess."

"Then get to work." Rose smiled at Sollux who smiled back and ripped john's belt from his jeans.

Aradia took this as her cue to get back to work she started rubbing Vriska’s panties. Vriska soon gave to in the sensation and started to moan ever so softly. Aradia positioned herself behind the blueblood kissing her and rubbing the ever-growing bulge in her pants. She quickly removed her bra and started to rub her small but perfectly formed breasts, they had always looked so enticing, their shape was extenuated perfectly by her jacket and while not the size of Feferi's or Aradia's own they were pretty stunning nonetheless. She toyed with them for a while teasing Vriska with two different rhythms until she could take no more.

Vriska quickly twisted around in Megido's grip and bit into her neck sending a shiver of pleasure down her. She tore off Aradia’s god tier robes with one motion and her panties with a second. She shot her hand down into the wet gap between the lowblood's thighs as Aradia let out a loud groan of pleasure. Aradia's exposed tentacle bulge emerged the gap as Vriska moved down to take it in her mouth. The warmth of the tenticular mass felt amazing in Vriska’s mouth as she sucked it, Aradia's moans and was like the only other thing in the world to the sensation.

She didn't miss the dream bubbles any more.

Aradia's bulge started to grow in Vriska’s mouth and soon her burgandy cum shot out into the Scorpio’s mouth. Vriska fell back, gasping for breath but Aradia moved in again, she slowly removed Vriska’s wet panties from her waist, exposing her gap. Vriska’s bulge shot out and entangled itself with Aradia’s, both letting off juices of their respective blood colours, the two lay moaning as their tentacles fought for supremacy. Soon Vriska's overpowered the lowblood’s simply by virtue of having not already cum and Vriska positioned herself above the Aries. Aradia's bulge retreated into her gap and Vriska’s followed as she thrust forwards. Aradia shouted loudly upon the penetration and ecstasy filled her face as Vriska’s hips went in faster and harder. Eventually Vriska’s bulge exploded with cum just as Aradia’s had and, as she retrieved her bulge from inside her friend, a large amount of genetic material spilt out onto the floor.

Vriska pulled herself backwards to lean on a wall. That felt good. That felt really fucking good, she thought. No wonder we have quadrants if sex is like THAT.

A few meters away Rose was excitedly scribbling in a large notepad, she seemed to have already written about 10 pages. She came to an abrupt stop and turned to Kanaya. “Could you clean that up Kan?” She asked to the Troll.

Kanaya stared back “First You Wind up John Like This, Requiring Me To Auspistice Between Him And What You Referred To As His “Dormant Bisexuality”, Which I’m Not Even Sure Is A Thing, And Now You Want Me To Clean Up My Ex-Palemate’s Genetic Fluids? Have You Not Asked Enough Of Me?”

Rose rose from the bed, which she was sitting on and walked up to Kanaya, kissing her fully on the lips, stepping back she pulled a bucket from her Captchalogue.

“For fuck2 2ake will you warn u2 before you pull out your fuckiing paiil2.” Sollux shouted, averting his eyes.

“Come on Sollux, It’s not like you didn’t just watch that all get made anyway,” Aradia, still completely naked, said walking up to Sollux and pressing her large breasts against him and placing a hand on his crotch. “You liked it too I can tell,” she whispered not so quietly into his ear.

Sollux broke into a smile, “Fuck you aa, ii wiish ii’d never got Aranea to fix my bliinde22 after that fuckiin abomiinatiion erii2ol2priite biit the du2t.” He leant down and kissed his childhood sweetheart on the lips. Sollux had to admit she’d rounded out very nicely over her eternity in the afterlife, although she had only physically aged one sweep, just like Sollux and Vriska had after leaving the dream bubbles.

“Don’t start yet!” Rose shouted wringing a cloth covered in Vriska-Aradia juice into a bucket, placing the bucket at the side then grabbing her notebook.


	2. Hey Sister Sol Sister.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I did like 2 proofreads of this chapter and i always found a 2 or double i missing in sollux's dialouge. Damn trolls.

Sollux and Aradia moved over to the bed, and as the Aries sat onto it Sollux tore his black jeans from his waist with a flick of his hand. Rose began to write.

“What ii2 your fuckiing deal ro2e? Nothiing’2 happened yet.” Sollux turned to face the girl who paid no mind to him.

Aradia giggled and tore of Sollux’s pants, causing his cheeks to turn a dirty mustard colour.

“AA? Really? II don’t have to put up wiith thii2 2hiit, giive a guy some fuckiing space alriight?”

“Come On Sollux, It’s For Good Of The Continued Existence Of Our Species.” Kanaya said, picking up some of the discarded clothes lying around. “Besides, It’s Not Like You Have Much Choice.” She pointed to his boxers which had been tore into three parts by Aradia’s psychic powers.

“Okay you’re riight ii'm 2orry. But you guy2 owe me 2ome fuckiing clothe2 alright?”

“Dude the amount of grist needed to make your clothes is pennies!” Vriska chimed in.

“Enough Talk!” Aradia shouted pulling Sollux onto her and kissing him deeply. Sollux moved his hands behind her back and slowly traced along the edge of her body, maintaining the kiss all the time. His hand paused upon reaching her legs then spread them apart. Breaking away from the kiss his mouth moved down into the range of her gap and his forked tongue flicked the tender skin surrounding it sending a shiver of pleasure down Aradia’s body. Sollux could smell the scent of Vriska upon the Aries’ genitals which turned him on even more than he already was. 

His tongue moved inside Aradia’s gap and came into contact with her bulge still lathered in both her and Vriska’s cum, it must be said the two tasted quite different Aradia’s sweet and thick while Vriska’s was much thinner and saltier. Aradia’s bulge moved into Sollux’s mouth and soon he was choking, Aradia pushed down on his body as her bulge worked its way down his throat. Sollux rose up gasping and coughing up the red and blue genetic material.

“Whoa Aradiia, that2 maybe a biit two rough.” Sollux spluttered. But Aradia had meant it when she said she’d had enough talking, she pulled the yellow blood below her and her middle fingers shot into his gap. Sollux moaned as Aradia softly flicked the tentacle which lay inside. Then she straddled him her bulge reaching into his gap and grabbing his. It was very hard and took little convincing to shoot up into Aradia’s gap. Aradia slowly lifted herself up and down on the yellow bulge extruding from Sollux. Pleasure soared down them both as Aradia’s speed increased. Sollux came, his yellow cream filled his gap and was soon joined by Aradia’s red mixture.

The two looked at each other as Aradia lifted herself off his body and was handed a pail by Rose. She placed it underneath Sollux who then dispensed a large amount of thick orange discharge.

“Hmm, red romance is quite different to black romance isn’t it? Are the two both just as natural as each other?” She asked Aradia.

“Oh yes,” Aradia said, “No matter the amount of quadrant confusion that can take place you know exactly what’s what when it gets to sex.”

“Well, I’d better get back to monitoring those two.” Rose said pointing vaguely behind her where John and Vriska were currently attached at the mouth.

Aradia tipped her head slightly, “How did that happen?”

Sollux was too busy being in bliss to care.


	3. You’d have thought we’d have noticed that. Huh.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The John/Vriska Chapter. Hooray.
> 
> This is the longest chapter and has the best dialouge, becuase that's what people read this kind of fic for right? The dialouge?

John watched as Aradia pulled Sollux onto him. “Well… uhm this is…” He stumbled over his words. John Egbert was currently in between the only girl to have ever asked him out on a date, who is, it is important to point out, also a naked alien and the girl an alien once told him he was going to marry, who was currently watching two members of the aforementioned alien species having sex and taking notes.

This was not a situation john felt comfortable in, to say the least. This was plain to see when he recoiled violently in reaction to being tapped on the shoulder.

“Wow John, Smooooooooth.” Vriska smirked watching the half-naked boy fall backwards into the wall behind them. John didn’t know how she did it, but when she stressed letters you could tell she was saying eight of them, it was one of the many things John just didn’t get about this girl. One of those was how nonchalant about killing she was. Another was why he found all of this really attractive. “I was just commenting on how awkward this is, right? I guess Kanaya sees it as important continuing our species and I guess Rose kinda gets off on it 8ut she said this was meant to 8e research on interspecies 8reeding right? All I see so far is Trolls 8anging each other.”

“Uh.”

“I don’t really understand any of this, I’m kinda dazed, first I think like, what the fuck rose is coming on to me pretty hard here. Then her girlfriend comes in and then Aradia suddenly has black feelings for me, like she didn’t mention that in the bloody eons we spent together did she? Would’ve been nice, what with my Dancestor and Meenah flirting all the time. Not that it wasn’t nice; it’s just not the way I’d thought I’d lose my black virginity really.”

“So did you lose you red virginity to Tavros?”

“John I 8elieve that is none of your damn 8usiness 8ut I like that you had the 8alls to ask. Anyway I don’t know what the fuck you’re on a8out with that line of enquiry; there was never anything 8ewteen me and that guy. Seriously he rejects me, tries to kill me and then after a millennia in the land of the dead he decides we’re matesprits? That’d 8e hilarious if it weren’t so damn path8tic!”

“Oh sorry.”

“8ut I did lose my red virginity in the dream 8u88les and I think you know who to.” Vriska winked.

“Uh, who?” John said confused as ever.

“You, idiot! Well n8t really you, the idiot version of you that listened to Terezi and got 8wned by your denizen.”

“Oh, that’s a shame.” John mumbled.

“What that it was you and yet you never got to try this?” Vriska gestured across her body with a wink. “Maybe it’s not too late Eg8ert, I still haven’t properly thanked you for this ring.” Vriska held her left hand up and wriggled her fingers.

“Oh… uhm you’re welcome for that Vriska, but aren’t we trying tommmph-“ John was interrupted by Vriska kissing him. “Keep your cool Egbert” John thought as Vriska tongue made its way into his mouth. His mind turned back to the secret tutoring Jade has given him a good two years ago.

**Chapter 3 Chapter 2 Are we really gonna do a flashback?**

“It’s really simple John, not too much tongue, move with the other person.” Memory Jade said.

“This is weird,” John said facing her, “I used to have a crush on you and now you’re my dog-sister and you’re teaching me how to kiss so I don’t screw it up with an alien girl who I only knew for a day a year ago.”

“Shh,” Jade said “God, we don’t need to know about our weird retro-active incest crushes.”

“Do you think Dave and Rose have ever discussed that kind of thing?” John asked.

“SHHHHHH!” Jade exclaimed “Probably, now stop avoiding the topic and kiss your damn ecto-sister.”

“You don’t, actually want me to kiss you, do you?” John stammered.

“How else will you learn? God, we have to iron out all that shit Dave told you about kissing. I can’t believe you could take any of that stuff seriously he was obviously joking around. “Lick the sides of her mouth because then she feels pleasure in her ears?” You’re so gullible John.”

“What if Dave takes his own advice though and when we get to the new session…”

“…” Jade frowned. “Let’s deal with that when we come to it shall we?”

“Can I just say I don’t?” Davesprite said startling the two and causing them to jump apart. “Aww come on guys I had popcorn and everything I was waiting to see the latest performance by the Egbert-Harley Incest Theatre. I wasn’t gonna tell Jane I swear!”

“Fuck off Strider,” John said “And who is Jane.”

“Uh Nannasprite, John don’t you know your own grandmother slash ectobiological mother’s name?”

“No her names, Nanna as far as I am concerned.”

“Well what are the rest of us supposed to call her?” Davesprite said throwing some popcorn into his mouth.

“JOHN” Vriska shouted.

**Chapter 3 Chapter 1 again I guess?**

“Wha- Jade?” John snapped out of his kiss-induced flashback.

“Dude diid you 2eriiou2ly ju2t 2hout out your fuckiing 2ii2ter2 name after being kii22ed by a giirl.” Sollux smirked.

“Classic Freudian psychology.” Rose declared.

“John were you thinking a8out kissing your fucking sister while you were kissing me?”

“What? No, well yes. But I didn’t ahh no that sounded wrong. Shit. Vriska, it’s just that you kissed me and I didn’t know what to do so I thought about some advice Jade gave me, then it turned into this weird flashback.”

Vriska blinked. “That’s weird but I guess I 8elive you, sorry john I guess that was kinda out of the 8lue.”

“No it’s fine, it’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while actually. The whole kissing thing. With you, not jade. I mean I did want to do it with jade but that was like 4 years ago before I knew we were relmmmph-“

Vriska kissed him again and quickly broke away. “Shut up John. Jegus.”

John moved back in to the kiss and placed his hands on Vriska’s shoulders. As the kiss intensified he moved his hands down her long arms until they touched her hands. Vriska moved them onto her ass and wrapped her arms around his neck. She pulled away and softly whispered into his ear.

“Catch.” With this she jumped onto him wrapping her long legs around his waist. John was caught off guard slightly but caught the Troll and carried her over to the bed which Sollux had now removed himself from. He lay the troll softly on the bed before reaching for his pants when there was a thud.

As Kanaya reached to pick up the clipboard she had dropped, John suddenly remembered about the other people in the room and started to turn a red so bright it put Kanaya’s auto-luminesce to shame.

Rose looked up from her book. “Come on John, two lovely troll ladies have already stripped down in front of you, the least you could do is give them this in return.” She smirked and went back to writing.

John blushed a brighter red yet before reluctantly dropping his pants revealing a large bulge in his boxers.

“2he really diid a number on you there John,” Sollux tipped his glasses. “Your bulge iis already out and iit looks pretty hard.”

John’s redness hit a critical point where Kanaya was actually worried Terezi might smell it on the other side of the meteor. “It’s Not A Tentacle Bulge Sollux.” She explained, “Males And Females On Earth Can Only Reproduce Through Male Female Reproduction, Basically It Comes Down To Females Only Have A Gap And Males Just A Bulge, It’s Always Out.”

“Fuckiing hell human2 are weiird.” Sollux mused.

“We might say the same for you Sollux.” Rose muttered, still not looking up from her book. “A system where same-sex relationships are capable of offspring naturally, one where every person has two sexual partners and one where a species hands over all its breeding responsibilities to an insect race despite being biologically much more similar to mammals. All of this is practically unheard of on earth. For example what are the point of gender at all in you society? Both genders share the same genitalia and it’s not like females carry the young so your breasts are useless, I mean what is even the point? A lot of these are questions Kanaya and I are trying to answer.”

“The only thing ii’ve learned from thii2 ii2 2ex i2 fuckiing great, which ii2 a suprii2e two no-one, not even Egbert.”

The Egbert in question had at this point managed to slip off his boxers and slip under the best sheets amongst all the chatter. “You always did like it under those.” Vriska grinned moving her hand under the covers and running it along John’s leg.

“Vriska please don’t tell me what I like until I have made a decision to like it. It’s really off-putting.”

“You know what else you liked?” Vriska said before grabbing his dick and vigorously jerking him off. She moved her face down to his so their noses touched and kissed him softly not letting up on her hand speed for a moment. She began to kiss john more passionately biting into his lower lip with her teeth every now and then. Then she stopped.

Johns mind was awash with ecstasy. “You’ve 8uilt up a 8it more stamina than you had 8efore there.” Vriska grinned shaking her arm, “Never got cramp from doing that. Anyway come on, your turn.”

“Uh, for what?”

“Foreplay, idiot!” She rolled onto her back as john pulled himself up on his forearms, shifting over to her gap, he moved his mouth down pulling out his tongue to touch the delicate skin which lay down there. He hesitated for a moment, her scent filling his nose, he stopped to enjoy the feel of her smooth skin too, immersing himself in her with all his senses, and then with taste too. Vriska’s body stiffened slightly as john’s tongue touched her. His arms travelled back up her body and she started to relax again under his touch. There was no doubt in her mind she loved John Egbert, he just had this effect on her. Vriska could feel her bulge writhing to be in the open.

John, it must be said, did not react well the first time her saw Vriska’s bulge. In the dream bubbles she had simply assumed that humans shared the same biology as trolls in that regard. Vriska remembered this all too well. Sitting up she placed her hands on John’s shoulders and pushed him backwards onto his knees. Then placing both her thighs on his she lowered herself onto John’s dick. John let out a slightly audible gasp on penetration, and then a slightly louder one as Vriska’s bulge wrapped itself around his dick in her gap. 

“Oh, uh, wow. That’s nice.” John said his eyes locked with Vriska’s vision eightfold. She leant in to kiss him and started to move up an down on his dick slowly at first but soon speeding up. John suddenly felt a surging inside of him, he wanted to pull away at that moment but he was held down at three points by the troll girl. Vriska’s movements were only getting faster and before he knew it John came, blood rushed to his head as his seed burst its way into Vriska, who soon followed, some of her blue fluid spilling out. She dragged over a bucket and expelled the light blue fluid from her body, before turning her attention back to john, who appeared to have fainted.

“I’m sure he’ll come around soon enough.” Rose said, leaning over the pail and startling Vriska who, for the first time that night had forgotten there were six people in the room. “Hey Kanaya, what do you make of this stuff?”

“I’m Not Entirely Sure I Want To Give It To The New Mother Grub.” She said. “Humans Expel Very Little Fluid On Orgasm.”

“Isn’t that what we’re all here to work out?” Vriska said, “Although at the moment it seems more like Rose Lalonde’s matchmaking service more than anything else.”

Aradia who had still not left giggled. “I suppose it turned out to be like that didn’t it? Personally, I never would have guessed.”

“Ro2e, do you need u2 anymore or can we go?” Sollux motioned to Aradia and then the door.

“I suppose you can go yes, if John isn’t going to fulfil what we asked of him earlier.” Rose said standing up. “Honestly I thought that whole not being a homosexual thing was just an act.”

“I Think We All Did.” Kanaya added. Vriska, Aradia and Sollux nodded in agreement.

“So can I go too then?” John asked.


End file.
